Hash Trash 2012 July 29 Run #469 Anal-versary Red Dress Run

Hashers Present: AKAGAY, Potassium Pubinator, The Swallows Sisters, Psychodrunk, Texas T-Bag, The Steamer Family, Butt Plug, NFN’s Zack and Alex

Hares: Happy SM, Chainsaw Assacre

Latecummers: e-Kimchi, Sphincter,

At the start of this anal-versary hash, the question was raised as to why we do this during the hot as hell Summer day, vice the spring or fall, but I digress, for those of us brave enough to brave the heat of hell or a Sasebo summer day surrounded by locals who decided to take pictures & maybe laugh at us like a side show display. At least GI hobo wasn’t there this time, nor were the wankers to be named along with NFN Zack.

Anyhow as we fucked off out of Shimanose park on ward thru the street tour of Sasebo & multiple beerstops, wait where was the free beer for the hashers? Rather than being total wankers about it, moving along trail did we. Right to the train station thru and across the street to Wal-Mart Super center sized intersection facing the docks to the true taril arrow indicating a swim across the bay. This where we also noticed the enormous amount of ass outlines on the park benches..

As we proceed, towards the finish, There was confusion about XXX marks in succession, but towards the finish had no idea at the time who it was that caught up to Happy SM. Onto the finish where down-downs were conducted by way of hash tradition, Including the namingof NFN Zack. As there was many good suggestions but none were good enough. NFN Zack henceforth and forever more you shall be known as Suck My Gumballs. To the end of circle, where somebody busted ass before the end of the 1^st verse of swing low.

Noteworthy infractions include: Happy and Chainsaw for double beer meister, Autohashers: Swallows Sisters, The Steamer family & late cummer e-Kimchi. Chainsaw for littering, e-kimchi for not singing along to notes,

Noteworthy Praise: Happy SM for her “ICE” gasm

On-On +++>

Suck My Gumballs

Hasher formerly known as NFN Zack

Hash Trash 2012 July 22 Run #467 Wet Run

Present: Texas T-Bag, Chainsaw Assacre, Freeball Friday, B.O.B, S.T.D, NFN’s Zack, Randy, Scott and Matt (Virgin),

Guest Hashers: From Iwakuni: Barry An Twat Net, Queen La Queefa

Hare: Psychodrunk

Hot as hell the day was for a turn out of the semi usual suspects. That plus 2 guest hashers from Iwakuni white snake. I am still not sure why it was the wet run? Wait scratch that, when Psychodrunk is the hare, everything is opposite day. Such as running underneath Albuquerque  bridge to make a true trail arrow going the opposite way.  So on and so forth. Confusing as it was this time as the intersection by the main gate was making us wonder how psycho “got on base” to lay trail. But that wasn’t the case as he bee lined it along the sidewalk and fence to only cross the street by the SSK entrance leading us to confusion of a true trail that was not there last week.

On-On to the fucking stairs, well at least that part is obvious. The pursuant hounds found their way up the mountain thru a dual rehash of Sushi’s & Chainsaw’s old trails. Of which Chainsaw recognized but was lost temporarily behind an apartment building leading to more damn stairs!! Moving right along. Damned if we do damned if we don’t but sure enough failing to do a whistle check IVO of the love hotel. Shame on us.

Thru the straight away & into the Shiggy, yes I said shiggy. Because we hashers love shiggy, That is except for B.O.B who has been constantly whining about preference of pavement. Over the river and thru the woods to hash house we shall go. But to the surprise that we didn’t stop at the Shrine nearby.  As it were, Pressing thru more shiggy and making it all the way up to Yumihari, AGAIN!!! Or not all the way to a water machine for some much needed H20. Then back down the winding road into town again.

Not all the way down just yet, there was a lil more upwards to go before the last stretch of vines  spider webs, near slip and fall fatalites, and a stick violation etc….  

Noteworthy Infractions include: multiple misspellings on Psychodrunk. NFN Randy failing to get sex on Trail, NFN Matt with his broken backpack condom, Chainsaw mistaking true trail for an old mark, NFN Randy for a near stick up the ass, “splinter enima” a name suggestion for NFN Randy, and probably the most Heinous of all Texas T-bag for bringing Czech Budweiser!!!  Mental note to self there T-Bag, don’t bring Bud or happo-shu! Also bring more than 1 dip next time.

On-On

Chainsaw Assacre

Hash Trash 2012 July 21 Run #466 1st ever Store To Store Hash

Present: Chainsaw, ODS, Mama Suck Me, NFN’s Stephan, Josh , Zack and  Scott (Virgin)

Latecummers: Akagay, Potassium Pubinator, E.M.I

Hares/ Stores:

#1 Chainsaw / Nakamura (champion)

#2 ODS / Family Mart IVO Albuquerque

#3 MSM / ??? Package Store (ODS’s Dealer)

#4 AKAGAY / ??? Bar

#5 Chainsaw - NFN Scott / RIC

#6 Potassium – NFN Zack / Family mart (35)

#7 ODS / New Makati (Simon’s) Birthday

#8 CA / EMI Wild Side (Merci’s Birthday)

#9 ??  / New Makati

Twas a sultry summer evening for a last minute, well almost last minute that is because CA posted on facebook, Chainsaw using tech? WTH? Any how branching off on a tangent, so it be that Assacre was erected to go 1^st.  Thus leading to the tricky CB2 by the bridge, just because he was being a dick and because they assumed that he was goona go there 1^st.  Then ODS used tech to try saying they were lost in Sake Town.

ODS was erected #2 but to the tune of predictability, he did go to the Family mart by the bridge. Then had to fuck off momentarily, but had returned with latecummer Potassium Pubinator, Down Downs were conducted then Mama Suck Me was erected #3. Thus after trail violation of CB3, back to the intersection, we finally found the place It was a ??? package store (ODS’s) “Dealer” AKAgay decided to join the merry bunch as we interrogated the Virgin, NFN Scott to find out that the web made him cum & his sponsor wasn’t even there.

Akagay was erected as the next hare, but he was being the mega wanker and refused to carry the damn chalk tote. On ward we searched for nearly an hour but should we have turned left to find true trail going to ??? bar. Chainsaw was erected and he took NFN Scott with him leading unto an intersection turn right to find improper marks made by NFN Scott. To the amusement of the hares, seeing the hounds loop around and find the finish at the RIC nearby the movie theatre sitting on a park bench watching them walk right passed towards lion tower then again to the finish.

Potassium Pubinator and NFN Zack, would take the chalk from there and lead us to the Family Mart on the corner of 35. Shortly there after One Dog was erected only to draw a map to New Makati, and then finish. But by demand as the hashers were hungry & wanted to give non hasher Simon a proper birthday down-down but he was already gone!!!!  There we found latecummer E.M.I. The hashers found their way to wild side, attempting and succeeding at the proper birthday cheers for non hasher Mercy.

Forget who it was that hared last but we found our way back to New Makati to swing low & drink more beer.

On-On

Chainsaw Assacre

Hash Trash 2012 July 14 Run #464 Jail Break Run

Present: Captain Jack Swallows, Romanian Steamer, Chainsaw assacre, Papa Steamer, Lil Steamer, Akagay, Puddles the puppy pounder, Psychodrunk, STD, Meow Job, NFN Jesse

Hare(s): Twat Waffle & NFN Josh

Latecummers: Eiffel of Penis, Bent Over Board, ODS

On the latest rendition of a Twat Waffle trail, decent was the turnout for an overcast day, Hares away and 12 minutes were waited before hounds away, an early failure on the hares side as a BT towards alba bridge was already known due to hare seen back tracking. On-On after much confusion out of Nimitz Park Found Trail we did head, who said head… I mean running along towards Ishidake mountain. Trail continued up the mountain and thru some horribly marked shiggy, as we found our way following there tracks, actual tracks that is. But not before these not so devious hares were snared 2X, NFN Jesse caught them 1^st, then not even 10 Minutes later, chainsaw who according to NFN Jesse, “not to be outdone”

Further down and not too far past Kujukushima Zoo & Botanical gardens  Morikirara and thanks to intel from a few locals, Then as it would be Meow Job got them a 3^rd time,  thus because they were lost. Or so they say. Further along was a misspelled map going to Nimitz “bidge”  At this point in time we the frontrunners came to the conclusion that the hares hopped a taxi from there, Maybe chalk talk could have used a spelling lesson from there.

Moving right along, As Chainsaw quickly ruled out the theory of the taxi, he quickly caught up to Twat & NFN Josh again, but let them go w/ the warning that Psycho would not be so merciful. At this point the hounds were just fucking w/ them and trailed them for about a mile, despite the cluster of desperation boob checks was the map to new Makati, but before that was Puddles catching up to the hares again to make it the grand slam (4^th) snare for those non sports fans who didn’t get the reference.

Noteworthy infractions: Hares snared 4X twas quite humorous to see bare asses frozen to a block of ice. The Steamer family and NFN Sue for autohashing, Eiffel, ODS and B.O.B for backsliding, and perhaps the most heinous of violations, THE NAMEE, NFN JESSE FOR EAVESDROPPING ON THE DELIBERATION!!! After much deliberation NFN Jesse: Henceforth and forever more, you shall be known as “HOMO-SKIMO” And to the end of the beer was time to swing low To a bar to bar!!! 

On-On

Free Ball Friday

Hash Trash 2012 June 10 #457 Die Toe Pick Up Run

Present: Psychodrunk, Turcockatron, Texas T-Bag, Sushi Cowgirl, Chainsaw Assacre, Romanian Steamer, AKAGAY, Captain Jack Swallows, Happy SM, Bent Over Board, Shows To Daddy, Twat Waffle, Daddy's Porn Star, Pull My Strings, Lil Steamer, NFN's John, Juri, Kelly, Katsunori, Alex, Virgins: Mallory, Evan

Hares/Snares:

#1 Twat Waffle / Psychodrunk

#2 Psychodrunk / Twat Waffle

#3 Twat Waffle / Psychodrunk

#4 Psychodrunk / Turcockatron

#5 Turcockatron / Psychodrunk

#6 Psychodrunk / NFN John (Finish)

An experimental version of a pick up hash was started at Daito Station, vice Nimitz Park. So as Twat waffle was away, Sushi Cow Girl delighted Virgins & backsliders alike w/ the chalk talk to conclude just as the 5 minutes were up but it might as well have been the full 12 as Twat threw us all for a curve as the very 1st intersection was unusually marked & lined out confusing the hounds. Thus forth we spent 30+ minutes going by, around and thru the Daito driving school. At least until trail was found going up thru the shiggy on the far side of the school. As said trail went cold for Texas, Chainsaw, Sushi & NFN John, as was enough for the above mentioned hounds to shortcut the rest of the way. 

 Beer stop at 7-11. But not before, Turcockatron decided to stop at a playground?? Then there was a tunnel to go thru? As for Hare #2 Psycho, who of course always incorporates the use of stairs, go figure. Only to be caught by Twat waffle. Maybe he likes to eat the chalk rather than make trail marks with it. Moving right along. As the pack was making strides to catch yet another hare, which apparently was too much for STD and NFN Alex who decided to rest on the sidewalk along the way. Well at least Waffle decided to get caught in a shady spot this time.

Psycho away. As to a surprise of many. This speedracing bastard only made it about 100 meters or so before Turcockatron got him. Thus forth it seemed like those were trading snares until Psycho was caught at the end by NFN John. Then as he made the shocking discovery That Shortcutting bastards Texas T-bag and Chainsaw Assacre finished before he did!! All this while Sushi Cow Girl was nowhere to be found, hmmm. All except were outside the train station enjoying beer while waiting for the slow pack memebers.

Notable Violations include: Shows to Daddy (sleeping on trail/ or about to) Shortcutting, NFN John, T-bag, Chainsaw, Sushi. jaywalking w/in eyesight of a policeman standing outside of the Koban. (NFN John). Other hash buisness conducted at the Down-Downs were "Anal"versaries: TW (25) , CJS & B.O.B (10), and of course NFN's John / Juri (5) NFN John: Henceforth & forever more, you shall be known as "Beaver Fister" NFN Juri: Henceforth & forever more, you shall be known as " 2 Horse 2 Swallow" Ironic Twist for the Swallows Sisters? I think not!!!

On-On

Chainsaw Assacre

This run was attended by Twat Waffle, TCT, RS, Psychodrunk, CJS, SCG, Li’l Steamer, B.O.B, STD, Happy SM, PMS, TTB, DPS and NFNs John, Alex, Kelly and Juri.  This was a relay hash from Daito to the Sasebo train station.  Twat Waffle kicked off the first leg of the run.  He picked his chalk poorly (or well, if it was his intent) because after the first couple marks the Hounds spent around 20 minutes trumping around through the shiggy and alleyways before finding the right path.  Even then, in group, it was difficult to see the markings because they blended in so well with the sun-bleached pavement.  Eventually our eyes adjusted and we caught up with him at a beer stop.

Psychodrunk volunteered to take the next leg and went off in his usual, speed-kills manner.  With a five minute head start he was caught within five minutes.  After begging his case that it was happenstance that led to his capture we let him take the 3^rd leg.  Again we gave him five minutes.  Again he was caught within five minutes.  Truly, not a good day for Psychodrunk!

Turcock A Tron took the fourth leg.  By this point the group started separating as the more enthusiastic (or in better shape) took to the front.  This leg was perhaps the longest of the run, but eventually he was caught sitting by a bridge watching the fish.   He claimed he was spent at that point (more on that later).

Psycho then took the fifth leg.  Off he went.  In fact, several of us hadn’t realized he was gone until looking around and not seeing him.

At this point we decided to walk an additional five minutes.  Which was a good idea for Turcock A Tron because when NFN Kelly started leaving the pack he was able to keep up with her.  Was it the resting or something else that motivated him?

About half of the hounds made it to the Sasebo train station.  However, the day was getting long, and we still needed to get to New Makati for the down down.  Using smoke signals we notified the lagging hashers that we moved to New Makati and to skip the train station.

At the down down we celebrated the analversaries of Twatwaffle (25), Bent Over Board (10) and Captain Jack Swallow (10).   But most importantly we named two NFNs!!! Let us celebrate the introductions of:

Too Horse to Swallow

and

Beaver Fister

On on!

STD

Hash Trash 2012 June 2 #456 The Goat Sushi Debauchery Bar to Bar

We began our night at Nimitz park to the familiar sight of Hashers unnecessarily/awesomely drinking and pre-gaming our monthly bar to bar Hash.
Those in attendance were:  Psychodrunk, Captain Jack Swallows, 3MC, Eat My Ichi Go, NFN Gary, Free Ball Friday, One Dog Sleeping, Sushi Cowgirl, NFN Randy, Chocolate Brown Shit Stick (Shitty Shit Stick), NFN Jason, NFN Maki, Chainsaw Assacre (Steely Dan/DAD) and GFY.

Bar 1:  While we were still recovering from the shock of Sushi Cowgirl being present at a bar to bar he shocked us all by volunteering to Hare the first trail.  Hounds away straight across the bridge to Family Mart where we saw ourselves a beer stop and a check back.  The Hounds, clever as always, decided to skip the beer stop in order to get to a bar and spend more money.
Unfortunately, our destination was not a bar but a bench in the upper part of the Sasebo Park.  After being commanded to retrieve refreshment for his fellow Hounds Psychodrunk returned with refreshments aplenty.

Bar 2:  Our next erected Hares were ODS and NFN Randy who led us on a trail to Shooters, which was of course short cutted by GFY, Capt Jack Swallows, Sushi and Psycho.

Bar 3:  The next Hare erected was GFY who then stated that 3MC gave him an erection and requested that he also be erected to co-Hare.  GFY and 3MC proceeded to lay a stupid long trail with a CB7 only to end up a few stairs above Shooters at Cindy's.
Bar 4:  EMI made a nice little trail over to Da New Makati's
(Dangerzone/Blueball's) and we proceeded to get our drink on and oddly erect the Hash Trash writer, who was already getting trashed.
Bar 5:  Chainsaw decided to take us on the pilgrimage to Sake Town and unpredictably took us to XOXO.  Sushi and 3MC shortcutted so much that they may have beat the Hare to the finish.

Bar 6:  Sushi was erected the next Hare and off the Hounds go and so the controversy begins.  After following multiple "illegal intersection" X's we came upon a CB20 winding back to Sexy Girl.  GRY the Bar to Bar Hasherrif attempted to justify his positions existence by calling BS on the allegedly "illegally" Hared trail.  After consulting the Kangaroo court of which only consisted of Psycho and ODS (cause no one else gave a shit or was already to shitty drunk, take your pick) it was decided that the trail was easy enough to follow despite many turns and no intersections making it ok.  GFY, ever the asshole, vowed never to create another intersection if he Hared a trail.


Bar 7:  Sushi erected himself and we were on our way home to the gut of drinking central but on the way Free Ball Friday stumbled into Sushi for a Hare Snare.  We ended our trail at Playmates and oddly Sushi decided to use intersections again.

Bar 8:  Sushi gave himself another erection while simultaneously amazing his fellow Hashers with his stamina despite his advanced age.  At this point of the night I can recall things getting a bit hazy and the trail very shitty and confusing, bad combination for bar 8 of a bar to bar.  Sushi remedied the myriad issues with a tech on trail call to Psycho and we meandered on over to Bunny Bar where NFN Gary sang an awful rendition of "Glory Days", Psycho broke a fan and EMI smoked in a non smoking area (by this time we were in great bar to bar form).

Bar 9:  ODS was erected Hare and we made our first bar to bar stop at Bar G-Rock where NFN Randy dropped two cigarettes and then proceeded to smoke the shit out of both of them at the same time.

Bar 10:  CAPT Jack Swallows led us to River Rock on a drunkenly confusing trail in which we ran circles around the Love Doll/New Makati cho for what seemed like an eternity.  It was also at this time that Psychodrunk and NFN Maki disappeared for an awkwardly long amount of time (think what you will).


Bar 11:  GFY and ODS proceeded on the most obviously laid trail possible with X's the size of garbage can lids spaced about 2 feet apart leading to Wendyz.  While at Wendyz we decided to name NFN Maki and things got a little hazy.  After much deliberation she was voted by GFY and others as Kyushu Kruizer due to the fact she has never left the island of Kyushu.
Hilariously, embarrassingly and despite the fact GFY voted for Kyushu Kruizer he announced her to the Hash as DOWN AND HAPPY, which resulted in a lot of strange looks and an awesome awkward silence.  After correcting GFY's drunken mistake we swung low super half assed style and stumbled into the cool night air.

And so Hashers this ends the 456th chapter of our blurry and vomit inducing story.  ON-ON with love.

Very Respectfully Go Fuck Yourselves,

Goat Fuck Yourself

"FOR OFFICIAL USE ONLY - PRIVACY SENSITIVE: ANY MISUSE OR UNAUTHORIZED DISCLOSURE MAY RESULT IN BOTH CIVIL AND CRIMINAL PENALTIES"

Hash Trash 2012 May 27 Psychotic Shiggy Run

There was unusually good turnout for this latest version of a shitty Psychodrunk trail.  Perhaps it was the sunny, slightly warm weather, or maybe the hashers couldn’t find better plans for the day.   Those hoping for some margin of improvement over his typical trail included Captain Jack Swallow, Train Boner, Puddles the Puppy Pounder, Chainsaw Assacre, Bent Over Board, Sushi Cow Girl, Texas T-Bag, NFN Juri, NFN Dan, NFN Jesse, NFN Liz, NFN Randy, and NFN Dana.

Everyone gathered at the Yonkacho MacDonald’s at 1300 before catching the Matsuura Railways departure from Sasebo Chuo Station up into the hinterlands.   About four stops later, the train pulled into Senpukuji Station for chalk talk and the start of the run.  After a brief hash flash on the north side of the station (aka platform with no roof), the hare was away on Run #455 around 1400.  In keeping  Sasebo HHH traditions, the pack gave the hare a full 12-min head start (Oops! Did I say H*ad?) followed by 3-min of walking, which still proved to be insufficient lead time for Psychodrunk.   

From the station, the Psychodrunk took the trail west across the tracks, along a drainage ditch and through a typically narrow westward bound street towards Route 35 (see map).   The pack ran right in front of a group of stray kittens just before the drainage ditch, but somehow Chainsaw managed to refrain from “adopting” yet another one.   At the intersection of Route 35 and Route 498, Psycho took the pack through a pedestrian tunnel, then west, then south and eventually up a foot trail that led into the forested mountain on the west side of Setogoshi-Cho. 

The trail uphill through the forest was marked only with toilet paper “hash” hung from tree branches.  There was no existing foot trail for the pack to use as then crawled, slipped, and clawed their way upward through loose soil, tree leaves and the occasional Coca Cola bottle left by previous generations.   After the hill leveled out a bit, Psychodrunk was soon snared in the middle of the forest by NFN Jesse and Chainsaw.  The pack slowly gathered amid the dead branches, and live mosquitos, waiting for the traditional 5-min to pass away. 

Once again, the pack was off!... still upward, through the shiggy, protected from the day’s bright sunshine under the forest canopy.   After another three minutes or so of clawing their way upwards, the hare was once again caught on an extremely steep slope, still in the forest.  The pack gave him another h*^d start, but before this additional five minutes was up, Psychodrunk returned to the pack to ask for directions.  Having none to give, everyone braved the gauntlet of mosquitos yet again to give Psycho time to make a decent trail. 

After pulling on tree roots, branches, and avoiding the occasional falling rock, the pack eventually arrived on somewhat of a forest plateau near the top of Mt Maedake.  A few meters to the south, Psycho guided everyone to a long lost Pacific War era Imperial Army battery overgrown with trees.  Everyone took a look inside the structure, fortunately without encountering too many creepy crawlies.  Despite the constant buzz of mosquitos hovering around, Psycho took a brief rest near the tunnel entrance.  (I don’t recall Indiana Jones ever stopping to take a rest….)  Amazingly, only a few spiders had bothered to make spider webs through the forest, and the mamushi were not yet ready to come out and play.  Still, inside the tunnel, several people noted that the walls were “moving”.

After 15-minutes or so of exploration at the battery, the pack followed the trail clockwise around the plateau, then downward through a series of seldom used hiking trails to the very much appreciated beer stop.  Sushi Cow Girl and Texas T-Bag joined the pack a few minutes later, after following a retaining wall from the first battery to a much larger (artillery?) battery that appeared to be from the “Betcha Didn’t Know” series of AFN commercials.  Given the dangers of numerous uncovered manholes in the area, and a strong desire for, detailed exploration of the site was postponed to a future date.

All members of the pack gradually arrived at the beer stop, but it seemed to take forever for Capt Jack Swallow and NFN Juri to arrive.  Sushi Cow Girl climbed back up the hill, into the forest to help them find their way, and eventually they too made it to the beer stop.

From the beer stop, the trail descended southward onto paved roads that meandered through farms and neighborhoods.   After a half hour or so, the trail passed over Sasebo River near City Hall, then to the northwest entrance of the Yonka-cho Arcade where it took a bee line for Sasebo Chuo Station.

Depending on their individual state of exhaustion, hashers either sat down, or sprawled out on the pavement in front of the station.  Psycho explained to several passers-by in Japanese that these strange people lying about were not dead, but were merely resting.  Eventually, a hermit type lady with a wheeled walker returned to her shanty under the MR track, forcing the hashers to clear a path.  Upon departing from her house a few moments later, she remarked to the pack in English:  “You should be ashamed of yourselves!” 

With most of the pack at the finish, we took that as our cue to relocate.  During the walk to Nimitz Park, we passed by Kyosai Hospital where a woman in a wheel chair asked in Japanese if ODS was among us.  Sushi Cow Girl explained that ODS was still recovering from the previous night.

At Nimitz Park, the pack assembled under a pavilion and did their best to help the Veterans Group finish their Memorial Day keg of MGD.   Mechanical malfunction of the tap apparently prevented the last drops of brew from getting out of the keg.   Hashers did their best to form a circle amongst the picnic tables of the pavilion to go through the customary accusations, and find a good hash name for NFN Dan.  After much questioning,  pondering, and verses of “Free Beer for all the hashers…”  NFN Dan was named “Free Ball Friday” in reference to his ability to make 2 sets of tighty whiteys last for four days out of a five day TDY. 

Noteworthy infractions included Capt Jack Swallows being called out for finding a human skull on trail, and failing to bring it to the hash treasure box; and Still Borne Ranger was called out for loitering around Sasebo after having fuc*ed off the week prior.  Hashers helped take down and fold the flags before moving to the second stage down-down at New Makati where the Flounder eventually caught up with the hash survivors.

On On, Texas T-Bag

Hash Trash 2012 May 13 #452 Stillborne Waffle Run (Awful Waffle Run)

Hashers Present: Potassium Pubinator, Chocolate Shit Stick, Chainsaw Assacre, Secret Slip Enside, Romanian Steamer, Psychodrunk, Twat Waffle, Goat Fuck Yourself, Screw Drive Her, Stillborne Ranger, Bent Over Board, NFN’s Taylor, Brian, Dan, Kurina, Charles & Alex, Travis, Chelsea

Virgins Ty, Jenn, Alex

Backsliders: Trat, Follows Children, 3MC, Sushi Cow Girl, Akagay, $1 Boy Kay Toy, Daddy’s Porn star, Turcockatron, Pull My Strings, Incestuous In Salmonator,

Hare: Twat Waffle

Latecummers: ODS, Pai Pan Sphincter

So What had Happened was: on a semi overcast Sunday afternoon, which happened to be quite a fashionable turn out as many a backslider were there. Twat waffle as the hare this afternoon giving the chalk talk then to be blessed and away w/ direction to find beer. Brief continuation of chalk talk was to follow along with Psychodrunk to advertise for the Nash Hash like he was a sleazy time share salesman. So as 12 minutes passed; hounds away. However backslider Tur-cocka-tron & daddy’s porn star forgot about the 3 minutes of walking. WHOOPS!!! Anyhow, moving right along,  As the trail it’s self was uber-shitty and not to hard for the pursuing pack to figure out, As a secret informant was happy to rat out Twat waffle, but not until after the CB20 was detected. Upwards, and onwards to what seemed like we were going up to Mt. Yumihari AGAIN! Was yet another informant who was happy to dime out TW.  Ever so closely sniffing out for the fleeing hare and beer we continued up the steps thru to a 5 way intersection onwards onto a private driveway as we would discover later. Hare Snare #1 and the honors go to Follows Children. Twat Waffle Claims to have done this on Purpose for a hash flash w/ a view, or so he says.
While holding out for Incestuous Insalmonator, for this view the hounds ultimately were bored and released Twat Waffle directing him to find beer. Finally into the shiggy, where proper trail would get cold and the pack was lost for what seemed like hours & hours As all the hounds searched the woods for no further sign of trail, where a local gardner came out and warned us about venomous snakes & not to cut thru his garden where we suspected the real trail ultimately went.
As the pack made their way up to the top onto the street above, where no trail was found in a scope of 369°, As it seemed like all damn day searching in vain a few hashers finally found trail, where as most gave up & short cutted back to Nimitz Park. Thus resulting in a social for more than 69% of the hash would be shortcutting bastards.
Meanwhile those who did find true trail continued on, As Sushi Cow Girl ultimately caught TW for snare #2. Not too long after that The not so slick hare was spotted again by 3mc who in pursuit slid down the hill taking some bamboo with him gave chase to make the capture for #3. Holy shit, The 1^st ever HAT TRICK snare in Sasebo H3 “hash”tory!!! As he would be punished for in a unique manner, (ice in his shorts)
On-On to the finish which was at New Makati for the down-downs and hash business such as SBR’s fuckoff, TCT & SBR’s 10^th anal-versary, Twat Waffle who would do his 1^st down-down from a baby bottle as he became a father, & NFN Kurina who, Now and forever more be known as “Lil Steamer” After swing low a few hashers would stay to drink more beer and empty the Keg.


On-On 
Chainsaw Assacre

Hash Trash 2012 May 11 Post Meeting Bar to Bar #(450.5) 451

Hashers Present: A.S.U.T.A, One Dog Sleeping, Goat Fuck yourself, Twat Waffle, 3mc, B.O.B, & NFN Bryan (Virgin)

Hares:

#1: Twat Waffle: Shitty trail to Playmates Surprisingly not caught this time.

#2: O.D.S: To Wild Side.

#3: B.O.B / NFN Bryan: a “hare” brained route to Bunny bar for (beer pong a plenty)

#4: Anti-Seize Up the ass to: 2^nd house: Where proper virgin interrogation occurred.

#5: Goat Fuck yourself : Sky’s the limit

#6:  Twat waffle again:  On-On To hash bar Makati

#7: A.S.U.T.A: Gramophone for swing low

So there we were, no bullshit: As it was a decent turnout of 7 for the unscheduled post meeting bar to bar. As Twat waffle was away, Bent Over Board actually gave his virgin proper hash-ucation as we waited for the 5 minutes: Onwards for a ½ ass trail to Playmates, as it it was made up for for the intro of the Virgin to fellow hashers Lesbian Butt Flower, & Snowball.  Erected as next hare, One Dog Sleeping would lead the pack to Wild Sidhe where was originally thought was gonna be quiet enough to question NFN Bryan, but it wasn’t, Thus forth, B.O.B was erected & he brought NFN Bryan w/ him on a “hare” brained route to Bunny bar, but there was beer pong a plenty!!! That’s right, beer pong!!! So we stayed a long enough for a game. A first for the hash, but definitely not the last, It was there that ODS brought motion to rename Twat Waffle to awful, waffle subsequently denied by the kangaroo court. Next up was Anti-seize up the ass who set out for 2^nd house, where we conducted the virgin interrogation who has thus far proven himself to be a hasher. Goat Fuck yourself would take the pack to Sky’s the Limit where 3mc would be given a proper fuck off. Twat waffle would take the chalk again for trail to Makati, A semi regular hash bar that was unfortunately too crowded for hash business. Short lived was the stay and last but not least Anti-Sieze up the ass would lead us to Gramophone for the 7^th and final bar where we would drink more beer then swing low, and drink more beer!

On-On

Chainsaw Assacre

Hash Trash 2012 May 5 Run #450 Cinco / Drinko / Chinko De Mayo Pub Crawl

Hashers Present: Psychodrunk, Romanian Steamer, Twat Waffle, Chainsaw Assacre, Chocolate Brown Shitstick, Stillborne Ranger, NFN’s Toshi, Eri, & Raymond.

Late cummers: Goat Fuck yourself, One Dog Sleeping, e-Kimchi, Happy SM, NFN Dan, NFN ??, & Guest Hasher Trainboner.

Hare #1:   Psychodrunk, A shitty trail to Torakichi Restaurant

Hare #2:   Psychodrunk again, For a Shitty trail to Anchor

Hare #3:   Twat Waffle, Snared on a bar to bar again?

Hare #3.2  Chainsaw Assacre, overly bragging about a 6^th hare snare On-On to  Stand bar Shimezo.

Hare #4     One Dog Sleeping: A craptastic trail to Sexy Girl (Where Happy SM would join the pack)

Hare #5     Goat Fuck Yourself, Semi Devious enroute to Bar Flap.

Hare #6     Happy SM, Thru the Stairway of Twinkle Nishizawa to Takuan No Shippo. Latecummer, e-kimchi joined the pack.

Hare #7+   e-Kimchi/NFN Eri: Debauchery a plenty going to Baypoint.

Hare #8     C.S.S / NFN Raymond: to D’new Makati: for the interrogation & namings:

Hare #9    ??? On-On to the River Rock,

Hare #10  O.D.S, Really snared on such an ubershort shitty trail (I think he did that on Purpose)

Hare #11  C.A A simple turkey trail to Playmates for swing low

Hare #12  ??? for the On-On at ??

It was a pleasant Saturday evening, just as it conveniently happened to be Cinco/Drinko/Chinko De Mayo and a hell of a good reason for a pub crawl in true H3 fashion as we also had honoring us w/ his presence Guest hasher Train Boner (T.B) As chalk talk was completed hares away enroute on a uber long 1^st bar trail that would lead us up to & past city hall to Torakichi Restauraunt. Where Psycho would be commended for a S-H-I-T-T-Y T-R-A-I-L, NFN Raymond the would be a speed racing bastard. Romanian Steamer for tech on trail would be given honors via down-down. Then Joined by late cummer, ODS.

Hares away, it’s Psychodrunk again for a not so long run to Anchor bar, where as shortcutting bastard C.A would turn out to be the last bastard in, go f!@#$% figure. Where as we picked up new Hasher NFN Dan. T.B. would be called out / celebrated as an honored guest to the tune of brother hasher while drinking a chu-hai, Thought this was a beer drinking club? As we found out it was the internet that made him cum?

 This time twat waffle, was erected, & his route, would lead us to? Well we have no idea as C.A. spotted the hare & gave chase, Thru a valiant effort to ditch the pursuing hounds T.W was eventually snared, Hare 3.2, Chainsaw would lead the pack to the near far end of Sake town around the bend to Stand bar Shimezo. Down-Downs were celebrated and a good time was had by all.

Next up would be ODS, to take us to Sexy Girl where me met up w/ non-hasher Erin, to meet up w/ Happy SM, unfortunately we had to give a F!@#$ off for Romanian Steamer.

Goat fuck yourself was erected from there and away to Bar Flap: Here it was announced that the Annual Meeting would be at new Makati on Friday the 11^th.

Happy SM away to Takuan No Shippo with the Awesome chalk drawing of Stitch in the (head, who said head) I meant the bathroom. R-U? Says e-Kimchi upon her late entrance. As it was a night of  “ANAL-versaries” So we began interrogating NFN’ Raymond & Eri,

E-Kimchi along w/ NFN Eri laid a semi devious trail to baypoint with perhaps some debauchery in there as well? Here is where C.S.S was punished for his heinous new shoes violation, as well as the learning about virgin NFN Dan. TB was also given a proper F!@#$ off.

NFN Raymond and CSS would lead to New Makati for the all to partake in the honored naming tradition, Moving right along, Upon the finish of a rigorous interrogation we learned much, so NFN Raymond now and forever more, you shall be known as  “Bent On Board or B.O.B. NFN Eri now and forever more, you shall be known as “Captain Jack Swallows”

?? Would then lead the hounds to River Rock, as such, well I forget but O.D.S would be #10, Only to supposedly ran out of chalk (or so he says) To Be caught by Goat Fuck yourself, Then an oh fuck it as we ended up in bar paradise. Nearing the end but deciding to go for another round of shitty trail it was Chainsaw away to Playmates to meet up with Frashfrower and Snowball. The End as we do in Hash Tradition, Swing low was sung. “May the Hash Get A Piece” Or So we thought, Whoever strung up trail #12? I guess it was for the On-On.

On-On

Chainsaw Assacre

Hash Trash 2012 April 29 F@#$ Off Naga!

Hashers Present: PsychoDrunk, 3MC, Twat Waffle, A.K.A Gay, Happy SM, Sushi Cow Girl, Wombraider, Cliffhanger, Chocolate Shit Stick, Potassium Pubinator, Texas T-Bag, Chainsaw Assacre, Stillborne Ranger, Romanian Steamer, Shows to Daddy, &  NFN’s Kyle, Eri, Joe, Joy, Raymond & Virgins  Mami, Toshi, Charles

Hares / Snares: #1 Twat Waffle / 3MC. A double whammy on Short lived trails….

#2 3MC / Sushi Cow Girl: A defiant act on short trail followed up by stairs, anyone?

# 3 Sushi / Psychodrunk: Shortest shiggy trail w/ a twisted figure 8 crossover.

#4  Psycho / Sushi: A payback snare & a nice lil crossover then across 35

#5 Sushi / NFN Kyle & Chainsaw:  The finishers (premature as it were) NOT SNARED!!!

Latecummers:  Sphincter, Pai Pan, Naga Suck Me.
It was an overcast Sunday afternoon, but hell any day any weather is good for hashing right?? As it was yet another pick up hash starting at Nimitz park USO. As we the Harriers & Harriettes gathered for quite a good turnout the initial introductions & chalk talk was conducted followed by the Hash Flash & the Blessing of the 1^st erected hare Twat Waffle. It seems to me that 3MC forgot about the wave off of 3 minutes walking, Hares away for the short lived & backfired trail plan of Twat waffle starting the madness of the boob check, down to the end of the walk along the river. On-On the trail that lead the pack to the apartment building where Twat went up the spiral stair case to the top only to be snared cumming off of the ELEVATOR! , What’s this fucking nonsense when said the lame ass hare had to use tech? Then to be caught by 3MC whose trail was even more short lived, as he was caught by Short cutting SCG. That is not before the last defiant act of flipping the bird to the hound that would eventually snare him.
A 5 minute pause before hounds away again, at which point Psycho was quoted “Now onto some real trail marking” On-On to cross 35 to the beginning of the shiggy or so we thought, as it was Psycho that speed racing bastard who caught Sushi cow girl before he could disappear into the woods to lay out a twisted figure 8 crossover which would damn near lead to blood on trail from a slip & tumble by 3MC, S.T.D & TW. Maybe it was the combination of the almost blood & crossover that got Happy SM all hot & bothered so she could have sex w/ herself on trail. Downwards onto somebody’s property, what is it w/ Psycho & Trespassing? Only to back fire on him as he tried some more of his famous trickery only to be victim of a payback snare by a 2^nd time shortcutting Sushi Cow girl.
Another 5 minutes to take a breather then back at it. Following to a sandlot playground where the kids were happy to dime out our 2 time hare, who would grace the hallowed trail w/ a wicked cross over himself thus leading back to and across 35. 2^nd time was a recurring theme for SCG who twice crossed 35, short cutting to hare snare then after not so much trickery going up some stairs Sushi was snared a 2^nd time by NFN Kyle & Chainsaw Assacre. (Also the 2^nd time he was caught by an NFN!! ) So having a few minutes to breath & situate hares 6 and 7 were away to treat the pack to a touch of their own devious deception, leading up and down a twisted maze of streets, to a vantage point for a hash flash. Then back to the ultimately back to Nimitz Park for down-downs, 
Twat Waffle & 3MC, the front running and competing bastards who would ultimately bitch about too many boobs checks in reference to fear of being caught. However they did bring up the valid point of false advertising as Chainsaw marked beer near, but there was no beer at the finish. Thus prompting a beer run by the “prematurely” finishing hares. 
Finally onward to late cummers Naga Suck Me, Sphinchter and Pai Pan for the down-downs to discuss much hash business to include discussing all the shitty trails,  witnessing Texas T-bag pose as an Amway salesman peddling hash T shirts. Naga’s F!@#$% off,, last but certainly not least of the hash drinking all of the beer.
On-On Chainsaw Assacre