Hash Trash 2012 March 25 USO Run

Sasebo HHH Run #444
Virgins: NFN Kelly, NFN Eri
Backsliders: Psychodrunk, Pie Pan, Romanian Steamer, Kurina, NFN John
Big Time Backsliders: Ballerina Boboo
Birthdays: Chainsaw Assacre, Screwdriver, Kurina

The patio next to the Nimitz Park USO was covered with chalk talk by the time this hasher arrived, having parked the beer car near the JMSDF gymnasium. As luck would have it, the parking space next to the USO opened up right around 13:40, so Texas T-Bag moved the car there while fellow hashers used their bodies, or maybe just their odors, to keep other motorists from parking there. With the beer secured, talk soon shifted to who's turn it was to hare the first leg. Chainsaw advocated Texas, but soon several elbows were pointing at Chainsaw. With such motivation, he caved, and hare's away took place around 13:50.

Chainsaw led the first leg up the Sasebo River. Near Sougo Hospital, he left a boob check as his second intersection, but NFN Kelly soon had the true trail figured out. The trail led towards City Hall, then upward, towards Yumihari. Psycho and NFN John led the pack, following the true trail, while Texas shortcutted as usual. At one point, NFN John thought thought he saw Chainsaw laying trail on a road further up the hill. He quickly climbed under a bridge to lie in wait and snare the hare, but he ended up face to face with a young boy instead. Meanwhile, Texas T-Bag had found where the trail plunged into a forest and seemed to making a bee-line to the summit. After ascending across moss covered rocks, through abandoned terrace fields, the trail leveled off on a dirt road. The hare placed a devious CB3 that led hashers through a bamboo thicket, than a few other detours along the dirt road. Somehow he passed through some thick shiggy to descend back towards City Hall, but NFN John eventually snared him, and promptly wrote "Hair Stare".
NFN John led the trail to the Sasebo River, then crossed Route 35 to go into Kaneyama Shrine. The trail generally continued to the south, forcing the pack at one point to scramble down a children's playground. Finally, the trail crossed over to the Sasebo Library, then straight to Albuquerque Bridge and the finish.
Down Downs took place next to the usual picnic table. Psycho spent some private time with the bottled beer at the next table, treating the bottles better than America's Top Model. As usual, he promptly spilled some beer and faced the wrath of fellow hashers. Chainsaw drank as hare for the first leg, with NFN John drinking for the second leg. Psycho, Ballerina Bobo and NFN John drank for being racists. NFN Kelly drank for being the first biach in, but all the other biaches joined her for that down down. Infractions abounded: NFN John for stalking a little boy from below a bridge, Screw Driver for watching Texas search in vain for trail, when she had already seen the racists find true trail further down the dirt road; NFN John for poor spelling following his hare snare.
Next Run: Bar-to-Bar Run
OnOn, Texas T-Bag

Hash Trash 2012 March 17 St. Patrick's Day Pick Up Hash

Four hashers (twice the minimum required!) slowly assembled at Nimitz Park on an overcast, yet surprisingly warm afternoon to partake in Could-Be-You Run #443 on 17 March. First on the scene was Akagay, followed Texas T-Bag, Chainsaw Assacre and finally Screw Driver. After a few minutes of indecision, Texas T-Bag agreed to hare the “first leg” of the run. Since being snared on a similar Could-Be-You run a few weeks earlier, this time TTB made sure to have a solid plan for the first 300m of trail. In what can only be considered in the same light as reaching the summit of Everest, swimming across the Mississippi, or free climbing Yosemite’s Half Dome, Texas T-Bag led the pack along the best impromptu trail of the year! After crossing Albuquerque Bridge, he took the trail around Kyosai Hospital, under Sasebo Chuo Station, across the Yonkacho Arcade, across Route 35, then back into Yonkacho Arcade, and finally east across Route 35 for the next 1:45 of trail. The trail gradually ascended through the alleys and stairways of Miura-cho, further up to Yamazumi-cho, along the east side of Shirahae Elementary and eventually up and over a patch of forest to Kosasebo-cho. From there the trail gradually returned toward Sasebo’s Public Library, then through Sailor Town and back to the usual finish location.

The hare finished at 15:54, but the first bastard in (Chainsaw) didn’t arrive until 16:20. Post run reports revealed nobody slipped on the rocks in the forest, a farmer might be missing a few oranges, and a sexy young vixen with legs up to here (sorry, no visual for reference) was seen exiting a taxi cab and entering the Love Hotel near Chainsaw’s apartment. Throughout the down-down, Screw Driver slowly nursed her bottle of water, except when forced to pick up her pace through drinking down-downs for being the first biach in, the last biach in, and for being a short cutting bastard. Chainsaw consumed a few down-downs for being the first bastard in, while Akagay was slower than molasses. He did, however, manage to do some nampa on trail, but modestly claimed the intended target was “just a friend”. Pink Sausage arrived in the circle about half way through, but somehow managed to avoid being tagged with any down-downs. Yours Truly had to abstain from all alcohol because of the need to drive back, but Chainsaw and Akagay managed to finish off a few fine BEvERages. Aside from some bits of green clothing, the most notable tribute to St Patricks Day was shown in the O’Doul’s fake beer that TTB had to endure. Yadaa!

On On, Texas T-Bag