Hash Trash 2012 May 5 Run #450 Cinco / Drinko / Chinko De Mayo Pub Crawl

Hashers Present: Psychodrunk, Romanian Steamer, Twat Waffle, Chainsaw Assacre, Chocolate Brown Shitstick, Stillborne Ranger, NFN’s Toshi, Eri, & Raymond.

Late cummers: Goat Fuck yourself, One Dog Sleeping, e-Kimchi, Happy SM, NFN Dan, NFN ??, & Guest Hasher Trainboner.

Hare #1:   Psychodrunk, A shitty trail to Torakichi Restaurant

Hare #2:   Psychodrunk again, For a Shitty trail to Anchor

Hare #3:   Twat Waffle, Snared on a bar to bar again?

Hare #3.2  Chainsaw Assacre, overly bragging about a 6^th hare snare On-On to  Stand bar Shimezo.

Hare #4     One Dog Sleeping: A craptastic trail to Sexy Girl (Where Happy SM would join the pack)

Hare #5     Goat Fuck Yourself, Semi Devious enroute to Bar Flap.

Hare #6     Happy SM, Thru the Stairway of Twinkle Nishizawa to Takuan No Shippo. Latecummer, e-kimchi joined the pack.

Hare #7+   e-Kimchi/NFN Eri: Debauchery a plenty going to Baypoint.

Hare #8     C.S.S / NFN Raymond: to D’new Makati: for the interrogation & namings:

Hare #9    ??? On-On to the River Rock,

Hare #10  O.D.S, Really snared on such an ubershort shitty trail (I think he did that on Purpose)

Hare #11  C.A A simple turkey trail to Playmates for swing low

Hare #12  ??? for the On-On at ??

It was a pleasant Saturday evening, just as it conveniently happened to be Cinco/Drinko/Chinko De Mayo and a hell of a good reason for a pub crawl in true H3 fashion as we also had honoring us w/ his presence Guest hasher Train Boner (T.B) As chalk talk was completed hares away enroute on a uber long 1^st bar trail that would lead us up to & past city hall to Torakichi Restauraunt. Where Psycho would be commended for a S-H-I-T-T-Y T-R-A-I-L, NFN Raymond the would be a speed racing bastard. Romanian Steamer for tech on trail would be given honors via down-down. Then Joined by late cummer, ODS.

Hares away, it’s Psychodrunk again for a not so long run to Anchor bar, where as shortcutting bastard C.A would turn out to be the last bastard in, go f!@#$% figure. Where as we picked up new Hasher NFN Dan. T.B. would be called out / celebrated as an honored guest to the tune of brother hasher while drinking a chu-hai, Thought this was a beer drinking club? As we found out it was the internet that made him cum?

 This time twat waffle, was erected, & his route, would lead us to? Well we have no idea as C.A. spotted the hare & gave chase, Thru a valiant effort to ditch the pursuing hounds T.W was eventually snared, Hare 3.2, Chainsaw would lead the pack to the near far end of Sake town around the bend to Stand bar Shimezo. Down-Downs were celebrated and a good time was had by all.

Next up would be ODS, to take us to Sexy Girl where me met up w/ non-hasher Erin, to meet up w/ Happy SM, unfortunately we had to give a F!@#$ off for Romanian Steamer.

Goat fuck yourself was erected from there and away to Bar Flap: Here it was announced that the Annual Meeting would be at new Makati on Friday the 11^th.

Happy SM away to Takuan No Shippo with the Awesome chalk drawing of Stitch in the (head, who said head) I meant the bathroom. R-U? Says e-Kimchi upon her late entrance. As it was a night of  “ANAL-versaries” So we began interrogating NFN’ Raymond & Eri,

E-Kimchi along w/ NFN Eri laid a semi devious trail to baypoint with perhaps some debauchery in there as well? Here is where C.S.S was punished for his heinous new shoes violation, as well as the learning about virgin NFN Dan. TB was also given a proper F!@#$ off.

NFN Raymond and CSS would lead to New Makati for the all to partake in the honored naming tradition, Moving right along, Upon the finish of a rigorous interrogation we learned much, so NFN Raymond now and forever more, you shall be known as  “Bent On Board or B.O.B. NFN Eri now and forever more, you shall be known as “Captain Jack Swallows”

?? Would then lead the hounds to River Rock, as such, well I forget but O.D.S would be #10, Only to supposedly ran out of chalk (or so he says) To Be caught by Goat Fuck yourself, Then an oh fuck it as we ended up in bar paradise. Nearing the end but deciding to go for another round of shitty trail it was Chainsaw away to Playmates to meet up with Frashfrower and Snowball. The End as we do in Hash Tradition, Swing low was sung. “May the Hash Get A Piece” Or So we thought, Whoever strung up trail #12? I guess it was for the On-On.

On-On

Chainsaw Assacre

Hash Trash 2012 April 29 F@#$ Off Naga!

Hashers Present: PsychoDrunk, 3MC, Twat Waffle, A.K.A Gay, Happy SM, Sushi Cow Girl, Wombraider, Cliffhanger, Chocolate Shit Stick, Potassium Pubinator, Texas T-Bag, Chainsaw Assacre, Stillborne Ranger, Romanian Steamer, Shows to Daddy, &  NFN’s Kyle, Eri, Joe, Joy, Raymond & Virgins  Mami, Toshi, Charles

Hares / Snares: #1 Twat Waffle / 3MC. A double whammy on Short lived trails….

#2 3MC / Sushi Cow Girl: A defiant act on short trail followed up by stairs, anyone?

# 3 Sushi / Psychodrunk: Shortest shiggy trail w/ a twisted figure 8 crossover.

#4  Psycho / Sushi: A payback snare & a nice lil crossover then across 35

#5 Sushi / NFN Kyle & Chainsaw:  The finishers (premature as it were) NOT SNARED!!!

Latecummers:  Sphincter, Pai Pan, Naga Suck Me.
It was an overcast Sunday afternoon, but hell any day any weather is good for hashing right?? As it was yet another pick up hash starting at Nimitz park USO. As we the Harriers & Harriettes gathered for quite a good turnout the initial introductions & chalk talk was conducted followed by the Hash Flash & the Blessing of the 1^st erected hare Twat Waffle. It seems to me that 3MC forgot about the wave off of 3 minutes walking, Hares away for the short lived & backfired trail plan of Twat waffle starting the madness of the boob check, down to the end of the walk along the river. On-On the trail that lead the pack to the apartment building where Twat went up the spiral stair case to the top only to be snared cumming off of the ELEVATOR! , What’s this fucking nonsense when said the lame ass hare had to use tech? Then to be caught by 3MC whose trail was even more short lived, as he was caught by Short cutting SCG. That is not before the last defiant act of flipping the bird to the hound that would eventually snare him.
A 5 minute pause before hounds away again, at which point Psycho was quoted “Now onto some real trail marking” On-On to cross 35 to the beginning of the shiggy or so we thought, as it was Psycho that speed racing bastard who caught Sushi cow girl before he could disappear into the woods to lay out a twisted figure 8 crossover which would damn near lead to blood on trail from a slip & tumble by 3MC, S.T.D & TW. Maybe it was the combination of the almost blood & crossover that got Happy SM all hot & bothered so she could have sex w/ herself on trail. Downwards onto somebody’s property, what is it w/ Psycho & Trespassing? Only to back fire on him as he tried some more of his famous trickery only to be victim of a payback snare by a 2^nd time shortcutting Sushi Cow girl.
Another 5 minutes to take a breather then back at it. Following to a sandlot playground where the kids were happy to dime out our 2 time hare, who would grace the hallowed trail w/ a wicked cross over himself thus leading back to and across 35. 2^nd time was a recurring theme for SCG who twice crossed 35, short cutting to hare snare then after not so much trickery going up some stairs Sushi was snared a 2^nd time by NFN Kyle & Chainsaw Assacre. (Also the 2^nd time he was caught by an NFN!! ) So having a few minutes to breath & situate hares 6 and 7 were away to treat the pack to a touch of their own devious deception, leading up and down a twisted maze of streets, to a vantage point for a hash flash. Then back to the ultimately back to Nimitz Park for down-downs, 
Twat Waffle & 3MC, the front running and competing bastards who would ultimately bitch about too many boobs checks in reference to fear of being caught. However they did bring up the valid point of false advertising as Chainsaw marked beer near, but there was no beer at the finish. Thus prompting a beer run by the “prematurely” finishing hares. 
Finally onward to late cummers Naga Suck Me, Sphinchter and Pai Pan for the down-downs to discuss much hash business to include discussing all the shitty trails,  witnessing Texas T-bag pose as an Amway salesman peddling hash T shirts. Naga’s F!@#$% off,, last but certainly not least of the hash drinking all of the beer.
On-On Chainsaw Assacre

Hash Trash 2012 April 15 Texas T-Bag Can't Find The Beer Run

As the hounds assembled at the train station a local man asked to have his picture taken with the hounds. After the picture we had to wait for Psychodrunk who decided to show just on time for the 1325 train to HosTenBosch. Upon arrival the hounds patiently waited for the Hare to arrive. The hare, Texas Tea Bag, would ensure all the hounds were accounted for Chainsaw Assacre, Cliffhanger, Sushicowgirl, Psychodrunk, Pink Sausage, Happy SM, Screw Drive Her with her Grandson, Mommy Made me cum, STD, Twat Waffle, Womb Raider, 3MC, NFN Travis, NFN Chelsea, NFN Eri, NFN Juri, and our special guests from Okinawa Hash; Queene, NFN Steven, Belching Semen, and The Long One.

The hare would be blessed and hares away called with the HosTenBosch hotel just across the river. After Chalk talk by Sushi for the virgins, hounds away was called and the trail would follow the river. Soon the trail would make a turn where CB3 is seen and a local man, working his garden, would direct the hounds toward the hare. Across a river we would go, then up a hill and into the shiggy. Soon another road is found and the hounds would lose the trail just long enough for Psychodrunk to get shocked by an electric fence! The trail would lead down to a large rice field, although the trail would go around the rice field Sushi and Psycho would lead the short cut thru the fields to the trail. Here Sushi would smell alcohol from the Sake factory and short cut the trail missing the beer check set up by the beer miester, Pink Sausage. After a taste of the Sake, Sushi would find an intersection and thinking he was on the true trail, follow it backwards and find the rest of the hounds. Up the mountain we would go, and quickly descend thru the shiggy back into the valley. Then once again the trail would lead up a road that was never ending, this road would soon turn into a path, then a bamboo forest, all while going up and up and up! Soon the hounds had found the top of the mountain and start going down the other side. Here the hare, thinking the hounds were too close to him, would summons many wild boars to block the trail. Not to be slowed the front running bastard, Cliffhanger, would chase all the boars down the mountain so all other hounds would have free passage. Soon the trail was out of the shiggy and going toward Haiki, this is where the hare snare happened, after documenting his catch Cliffhanger would release the hare instructing him to find beer. The trail would continue near the river then past the fire department where the hare would write “only 20 KM more”, yes it was obvious the hare could not find the beer miester. After more than 13 KM the hare found the beer miester in the park waiting to hydrate all the hounds.

The hare would drink for his sh$%ty trail, then the virgins, and the girls. Happy SM would remind the hounds that when one Japanese drinks…all Japanese drink, so Psycho would join them. Our Okinawa visitors would teach us all a new song and drink in OKI style. With the beer running out swing low was called.

Just 400 meters away was the sushi go round that we all knew had cold beer so the onon would take us there to fill up on great food and BEER!

The next hash is scheduled for April 22, 1330 at Nimitz Park USO; this will be a reverse cowgirl run you will not want to miss. Check facebook or www.sasebohhh.com for all your Sasebo hashing questions.

+++> Sushicowgirl

Hash Trash 2012 March 25 USO Run

Sasebo HHH Run #444
Virgins: NFN Kelly, NFN Eri
Backsliders: Psychodrunk, Pie Pan, Romanian Steamer, Kurina, NFN John
Big Time Backsliders: Ballerina Boboo
Birthdays: Chainsaw Assacre, Screwdriver, Kurina

The patio next to the Nimitz Park USO was covered with chalk talk by the time this hasher arrived, having parked the beer car near the JMSDF gymnasium. As luck would have it, the parking space next to the USO opened up right around 13:40, so Texas T-Bag moved the car there while fellow hashers used their bodies, or maybe just their odors, to keep other motorists from parking there. With the beer secured, talk soon shifted to who's turn it was to hare the first leg. Chainsaw advocated Texas, but soon several elbows were pointing at Chainsaw. With such motivation, he caved, and hare's away took place around 13:50.

Chainsaw led the first leg up the Sasebo River. Near Sougo Hospital, he left a boob check as his second intersection, but NFN Kelly soon had the true trail figured out. The trail led towards City Hall, then upward, towards Yumihari. Psycho and NFN John led the pack, following the true trail, while Texas shortcutted as usual. At one point, NFN John thought thought he saw Chainsaw laying trail on a road further up the hill. He quickly climbed under a bridge to lie in wait and snare the hare, but he ended up face to face with a young boy instead. Meanwhile, Texas T-Bag had found where the trail plunged into a forest and seemed to making a bee-line to the summit. After ascending across moss covered rocks, through abandoned terrace fields, the trail leveled off on a dirt road. The hare placed a devious CB3 that led hashers through a bamboo thicket, than a few other detours along the dirt road. Somehow he passed through some thick shiggy to descend back towards City Hall, but NFN John eventually snared him, and promptly wrote "Hair Stare".
NFN John led the trail to the Sasebo River, then crossed Route 35 to go into Kaneyama Shrine. The trail generally continued to the south, forcing the pack at one point to scramble down a children's playground. Finally, the trail crossed over to the Sasebo Library, then straight to Albuquerque Bridge and the finish.
Down Downs took place next to the usual picnic table. Psycho spent some private time with the bottled beer at the next table, treating the bottles better than America's Top Model. As usual, he promptly spilled some beer and faced the wrath of fellow hashers. Chainsaw drank as hare for the first leg, with NFN John drinking for the second leg. Psycho, Ballerina Bobo and NFN John drank for being racists. NFN Kelly drank for being the first biach in, but all the other biaches joined her for that down down. Infractions abounded: NFN John for stalking a little boy from below a bridge, Screw Driver for watching Texas search in vain for trail, when she had already seen the racists find true trail further down the dirt road; NFN John for poor spelling following his hare snare.
Next Run: Bar-to-Bar Run
OnOn, Texas T-Bag

Hash Trash 2012 March 17 St. Patrick's Day Pick Up Hash

Four hashers (twice the minimum required!) slowly assembled at Nimitz Park on an overcast, yet surprisingly warm afternoon to partake in Could-Be-You Run #443 on 17 March. First on the scene was Akagay, followed Texas T-Bag, Chainsaw Assacre and finally Screw Driver. After a few minutes of indecision, Texas T-Bag agreed to hare the “first leg” of the run. Since being snared on a similar Could-Be-You run a few weeks earlier, this time TTB made sure to have a solid plan for the first 300m of trail. In what can only be considered in the same light as reaching the summit of Everest, swimming across the Mississippi, or free climbing Yosemite’s Half Dome, Texas T-Bag led the pack along the best impromptu trail of the year! After crossing Albuquerque Bridge, he took the trail around Kyosai Hospital, under Sasebo Chuo Station, across the Yonkacho Arcade, across Route 35, then back into Yonkacho Arcade, and finally east across Route 35 for the next 1:45 of trail. The trail gradually ascended through the alleys and stairways of Miura-cho, further up to Yamazumi-cho, along the east side of Shirahae Elementary and eventually up and over a patch of forest to Kosasebo-cho. From there the trail gradually returned toward Sasebo’s Public Library, then through Sailor Town and back to the usual finish location.

The hare finished at 15:54, but the first bastard in (Chainsaw) didn’t arrive until 16:20. Post run reports revealed nobody slipped on the rocks in the forest, a farmer might be missing a few oranges, and a sexy young vixen with legs up to here (sorry, no visual for reference) was seen exiting a taxi cab and entering the Love Hotel near Chainsaw’s apartment. Throughout the down-down, Screw Driver slowly nursed her bottle of water, except when forced to pick up her pace through drinking down-downs for being the first biach in, the last biach in, and for being a short cutting bastard. Chainsaw consumed a few down-downs for being the first bastard in, while Akagay was slower than molasses. He did, however, manage to do some nampa on trail, but modestly claimed the intended target was “just a friend”. Pink Sausage arrived in the circle about half way through, but somehow managed to avoid being tagged with any down-downs. Yours Truly had to abstain from all alcohol because of the need to drive back, but Chainsaw and Akagay managed to finish off a few fine BEvERages. Aside from some bits of green clothing, the most notable tribute to St Patricks Day was shown in the O’Doul’s fake beer that TTB had to endure. Yadaa!

On On, Texas T-Bag

Hash Trash 2012 February 12 Psychopathic Run

Hare: Psychodrunk Pack: iPhonicater, Happy SM, ScrewDriveHer, No Name Maki, Chainsaw Assacre, Cliffhanger, Sushi Cow Girl, No Name John (from Canada eh), Texas T-Bag

Hashers gathered at Gonjoji Park east of Haiki Station for run # 438 on a crisp, sunny Sunday. As a novel idea, Texas T-Bag tested the use of something called a "tripod" to facilitate the pre-run group photo. After a few shots, everyone realized that Sushi Cow Girl had suddenly disappeared. Still, the show had to go on. Unbelievably, the hare was away, rather promptly for a change, at 2:03PM blazing a trail towards the southeast. Soon Sushi Cow Girl returned with some biaches, so the pack didn't hassle him too much.

Since the trail was at least one standard deviation left of the normally S H I T T Y Psychodrunk trail, the pack spent much of the first 15 minutes of trail dazed and confused - much like a hyperactive dog, obsessed with chasing its tail until someone provides some doggie Prozac. Still, working together, the pack was able to piece together the bits and pieces of the trail (that's all there was!) and determine the general direction of the true trail. A few hash marks were found on the west and south side of Hirota Elementary School, and hashers were greeted by a few shouts of "Harrow" from cheerful school kids waking around the surrounding streets. Another three hash marks led the pack through the next 200m south of the school (Was the hare conserving chalk?) finally crossing the river, where another one or two hash marks continued to lead the trail to the south.

For some reason, there was an abundance of hash marks, and even a true-trail arrow or two in Hirota Park, adjacent to the playground that was packed with children enjoying the day. It almost seemed as if the hare must have slowed down in this area - possibly to check out something that rhymes with "molasses".

The trail passed through some rice paddies on the north side of Hirota Sports Park, past a lake where Chainsaw Assacre suggested would be good for bass fishing, then into a small shrine with BT marks all around. Nearby, Texas T-Bag made a spot inspection of the chalk being waved about by Screwdriver and Happy SM. Surprisingly, their sticks were pretty well worn down, suggesting they had been leaving a few pack arrows from time to time.... too bad yours truly never found them. From the shrine, the pack managed to find true trail that passed through a grandmother's driveway and up an over into the next valley. Psycho had apparently told the obaasan not to be too scared of the gringo barbarians that were soon to pass, so her reception to the pack was pretty cheerful. Too bad this would not last. The trail led down a valley toward P-Zone Pachinko, but the pack found a CB prior to getting close enough to see any departing customers who were suffering from O-Zone (big loss). From the CB, the trail turned north into some woods where the hashers were once again cheered on by ojiisan and obaasan. But the mood quickly changed as the pack ran down a foot trail leading back towards the sports park entrance. Along the foot trail, a woman came out of her house 50m west of the trail just to emphasize to hashers that the property near the trail was private, and nobody should run through her farm.

The hare took the pack west across the railroad tracks, past the Bulldog store, along the red jogging / biking path that hugged the shoreline, past a 6-story sweatshop factory, to a point where the hare tried to make it look like he had swam across the river to make true trail. The FRBs were not about to take the plunge, and swim across the river given the 8C temperature and lack of any wet footprints within view.

Soon, the pack returned to the park and competed for space with the local children who seemed to be challenging everyone to a pick-up soccer game. There were no dead birds for Happy SM to play with this time around, so instead she focused on drinking from her thimble size beer mug.

No Name John (from Canada eh), must work for the Canadian CIA or something, because all his answers to "Who made you come" and "How did you find the Hash" were all impeccably tied to beer and and the ability to sniff out a six-pack from miles away. Still, it seems that there was one activity missing from the standard trifecta of "Running" + "Drinking" + something else???

Hashers did their best to finish off the select (yet still reasonably cheap) bottled beer in the hour + of circle time. Since the pack had been so dispersed by the S H I T T Y trail, calls to "rat out your neighbor" resulted in very few vile Asians. With neighborhood kids using the circle as an impromptu soccer goal, the hashers tried their best to abstain from the usual profanity laced verses of song. Chainsaw raised a point-of-lager, questioning the dedication of hashers since they were singing so quietly, but everyone agreed that this was not the normal "noisy" pack. Surprisingly, all the carrots and celery disappeared well before the first bag of chips was emptied. Perhaps there is a correlation?

The circle wrapped up around 5PM with a Swing Low. Hashers dined at the nearby Haiki sushi-go-round. As luck would have it, their ticket number at the restaurant was #69. While there, Psychodrunk was unable to properly eat his sushi by using chopsticks at the sushi-go-round, so other hashers provided him with a fork. Apparently his wrist muscles had cramped from holding all that unused chalk on trail, or possibly something else that was similar (or much smaller) in size.

On On, Texas T-Bag

Hash Trash 2012 January 29 Texas Run

Texas T-Bag had no problem shortcutting the trail and he was the hare! The trail started from Nimitz park USO, 12 minutes after hare away was called the following hounds took to chasing the hare down: Psychodrunk, Chainsaw Assacre, Potassium Pubinator, Sushi Cowgirl, Screw Drive Her, One Dog Sleeping with his virgin NFN Joy, Romanian Steamer with her daughter Crena, 3MC, and Chocolate S%^& Stick.

The trail would cross the river; up past the arcade and across highway 35 we would go. Making a left the trail would soon have an intersection at the bottom of an endless set of stairs and up we would go. The trail would keep going up to the top of the hill and make another left at the top. At the intersection the trail would pass a shrine then up more stairs to a CB. Down a couple of stairs and thru the shiggy we would go in search of beer. The trail would come out of the shiggy to an intersection the lead hounds would find what they think is true trail and follow it up more stairs. Then BT was found and the lead hounds, Chainsaw, Psycho, and Sushi would go past the BT in search of a short cut just to find a trail with another BT. Backtracking this trail we would go back to the intersection where all the remaining hounds were exiting the shiggy. +++> was soon found and the hounds were back on the trail! Soon the hounds would realize we were going thru the shiggy heading right back to the trail, what is happening? Yes TTB had shortcut his trail right back and crossed thru an earlier intersection, crossing out the BT the trail would start going down hill. Sushi would miss a turn and shortcut into nowhere until he did a circle and found his fellow hounds to lead the way, tired and thirsty he would not falter. Psycho and Chainsaw would lead the way in search of the hare; the trail would go up another hill before starting down following the street. Soon a set of stairs would bring the trail back to highway 35 on its way to the finish at Sasebo Park.

Our youngest hasher, Crena, would make the entire 11 KM hash and still have energy to ride the swing while we completed our down downs. Many hashers would drink for perceived trail violations and backsliding. TTB held nothing back today and provided the thirsty hounds with a wide variety of beverages from around the world!

Onon would take us to the Kabab stand + where the owner takes pictures to post on facebook to show the world where hungry hashers go for a meal. Other onon’s would take us to Makati, Wendyz, and if my memory were correct we would make a brief stop at Playmates. It was a very tiring and dehydrating day so my memory may be off on what happened after and before the Kabab stand.

Watch your email, check facebook, or www.sasebohhh.com for the next hash, TTB will continue to be the token short cutter and there is sure to be some hash treasures picked up along the way!

+++> Sushi Cowgirl

Hash Trash 2011 December 31 Sasebo H3 New Years Eve all night bar to bar

New Years Eve hash started from Nimitz park with Psychodrunk and Pie Pan as the hare/co-hare. After a short flat trail that was too short, the trail led to bar River in Sake town. The hare would then keep the trail short and go to Romantic Blast for the hares to continue New Years celebration mismanagement. The third bar XOXO is where late cummer Sushi Cow Girl joins the hash and a new hare is erected. The hares, One Dog Sleeping and 3MC, would lay trail to Double A using a CB6 on the stairway. After quenching there thirst the hares, One Dog Sleeping and Goatfuckyourself, would lead the hounds to Jigger bar. Then Sushi Cow Girl would hare and after finding a closed bar at the proposed finish he would lead the hounds to Wendyz. Here is where Happy SM would join the hash and become a hare erection. Upon hounds away called the hounds would find a map outside Wendyz that would send them to the back door alley. After a quick navigation thru the alley the hounds would follow the trail to Makati. Here, just like last year, the hashers would celebrate the New Year at the stroke of midnight. This is a all night hash so the next trail laid by Chainsaw assacre would take the hounds to Gramophone. Then Chainsaw assacre and Akagay would lay trail to Anchor bar. Here One Dog Sleeping would be given his 69 head (who said head?) band in hash style. Then Pie Pan and 3MC would lay trail to Lion Tower bar Kiss Me. The trail was horribly laid, presumably to give these 2 hares some time alone, for what we don’t know! Here one more late cummer shows, Iphonicator. So the next trail is laid by Iphonicator and Sushi Cow Girl to Playmates. After saying hello to the fellow hashers behind the bar hares away was called and Goatfuckyourself and NFN Aki would lay trail to Sky is the Limit. Here the remaining hashers that have not gotten lost or otherwise disappeared would swing low. The onon plan would take us to Makati and from here the sun would start to rise and the hashers would start going toward home.

Watch your email or check facebook for the next hash, it is sure to be mismanaged just as much this year!

On on Sushi Cow Girl

Hash Trash 2011 August 28 Hash Paralympics

Hashers gathered at JR Huistenbosch station at 2PM on 28 August to celebrate the special para-olympics hash, hared by Sphincter as he hobbled along streets, up hills, stairways and promenades in his attempt to lead the Sasebo H3 pack to the promised land of cold beer.

Per reports heard by the pack, the quasi-immobile hare had actually started laying trail at noon, almost two hours prior the pack’s 2PM start. Consequently, the pack paid little heed to the long standing traditions of the Sasebo H3 that involved the pack walking for three minutes out of the start. From the start, the pack headed out the east exit of JR Huistenbosch, where they had gathered for chalk-talk. Psychodrunk and No-Name (chaplain?) were borderline racists as they lead the hashers along Route 205 south toward Haenosaki, looking for true trail.

The first intersection was found in front of a small shrine, just a few hundred meters east of the station. Texas T-bag led hashers across Rt 205, where the trail quickly descended into “Downtown” Haenosaki. The trail made a counter clockwise course through the residential streets, eventually leading across the salt water canal to the south, and heading east towards Nagata-cho. After a cleverly laid trail descending into a bamboo grove, the packers found a “check back 69” that forced a 5-minute U-turn back towards Haenozaki Station. From the north side of the Haenozaki guest hotel, the hare drew a quick and dirty map that showed the pack how to cross the original trail and head up the hill towards JR Huistenbosch Station. Under the station, next to Happy SM’s car, the pack finally discovered another map instructing the pack to cross the pedestrian bridge toward the ANA hotel, to pick up the next segment of trail.

Hashers headed south along the channel, eventually finding a “checkback 69/3” that brought the pack in another U-turn to the Huistenbosch parking lot exit. The pack crossed the parking lot and picked up trail along the main road leading to Hario, but soon crossed the street to pick up the trail heading north along the main road. At Huistenbosch bridge, the tail descended to a public park where the hare mercifully pointed out a source of water to the pack. From there the trail crossed to the west side of the main road, and headed north along several small farms, eventually ending at Sphincter’s house.

As the run had taken place during the heat of the day, without a single cloud in sight, the pack was understandably relieved to see the “Beer Near” sign and looked forward to some cool beer to quench the intense thirst built up by the pack during the 80 minutes of trail. However, the pack was shocked to find only 2 Asahi Dry beers and an old MGD waiting for all to share. After 20 minutes at the finish, the hare finally emerged from his house to take Happy SM and Akagay back to the start to pick up their rides. The hare also STARTED his hash shopping from that point, as the pack slowly cooled off while sharing a case of bottled water. The pack watched jet-skiers pass by on the Haiki channel while killing time.

After more than an hour at the finish, the hare finally returned to the finish, with a 5L mini-keg of Heineken and a case or two of MGD that was just starting to cool down on ice. The mini-keg seemed to lift the spirits of the hashers quite a bit, but they still called for blood in the form of a down-down from the hare for totally fuc**ing up the down-down festivities.

With beverages abundant, hashers were able to quickly charge their vessels, and the circle soon formed. First to drink was the hare for laying a S-H-I-T-T-Y trail, followed by Texas T-Bag for being the front running bastard. Happy SM was called to drink for being the first *itch to finish, but it was quickly revealed that she had written 16:20 as her finish time, instead of 15:20. Calls for all lesbians to drink soon filled the air, so iiKimochi, and I-Phonicator joined her in the circle for the first of many social down-downs. While at the circle, the pack ran through the traditional list of infractions, including footwear, and Nike “swoosh” gear. On several occasions, those with mismanagement experience were called to join the evil-doer in the circle under the auspices of a group down-down. Finally Chainsaw Assacre changed the theme of the evening by posing a somewhat serious question to the circle: “Why doesn’t Sasebo HHH host the Nash Hash?” Spinchter and Texas T-Bag explained the process of “earning” the Nash Hash bid, from the initial lobbying efforts at the current Nash Hash, to political fallout associated with hosting the Nash Hash. The Kangaroo court suggested multiple locations for a possible Sasebo Nash Hash, including camping cabins at Lake Isanoura in Saikai City, to an overnighter in Ureshino Onsen, to a pristine beach in the Goto Islands, to a campground near Ryumon Dam in Arita City. Psychodrunk adamantly rejected the Ureshino proposal, citing his ability to continue to live there as a concern. Eventually the votes of the pack seemed to center on a campground at Ryumon Lake near Arita City, where Psychodrunk said there was an abundance of possible hash trails. The pack decided to pursue such an overnighter as a Sasebo HHH exclusive event, to test the feasibility of a potential Nash Hash bid.

Everything seemed to be going fine, when the pack ran out of beer. Not only had the hare failed to buy beer for the finish, the beer he bought was not enough to last for a reasonable duration down-down. Soon, Happy and some volunteers were dispatched to the nearest convenience store to buy some beer, but instead, the returned with two 6-packs of “happoshu”, a disgusting concoction of peas, beans, and other low left-over vegetables acquired by brewing companies to undermine Japanese beer tax laws. Texas T-Bag protested but the pack just didn’t seem to understand the calamity at hand.

After ordering curry rice for delivery, the pack sang “Swing Low” and retired to Sphincter’s house to “endure” the happoshu while waiting for the curry rice to arrive.

OnOn, Texas T-Bag

Hash Trash 2011 July 10 #407 Shrine Run A.K.A “The Lame Hare”

It all started on a hellfire hot Sunday afternoon at Shimanose Park right by the Starbucks. Not too long after the lame hare Psychodrunk had concluded the chalk talk. Hare away, shortly there after we would be cross paths with the G.I Hobo again. Meanwhile Brown Eye Dragon & NFN Sandra would try to get some “pussy” A 3-way before trail? Awesome idea, but that was not the case. 12 minutes later “hounds away” Across 35, over the ditch & thru the woods to hash house we shall go. I say thbru the ditch, because Sushi Cow Girl decided to, just because he can I guess. Trail was soon regained up the stairs then down over into a small patch of shiggy by an empty water tank. Shortly thereafter we passed hotel 21, but failed to do a whistle check. Past the hotel up the street then to a residential section of town where we almost got lost again. At this point O.D.S discovered the 1^st of 2 pieces of hash treasure in form a page from a porno mag. Up the ladder into another small section shiggy and onward the pack was in pursuit. Up and down the hills and stairs where we would discover dead pussy on trail. Down, Up and over is where O.D.S would have to call it quits, damn the heat. NFN Sandra also had to cut it short as to make sure ODS got into a cab & made it back. They would later be accused of sex in the cab during the down-down. Back on the street past the construction site is where Chainsaw Assacre found a dart gun which is the 2^nd bit of hash treasure. Further along past a series of intersections, the hounds would find a CB 6 lthus leaving us confused and searching for damn near ½ an hour until true trail was found again. This would lead the pack into some more shiggy and finally the only shrine we would pass thru. Trail was further followed up the hill into more shiggy. Up to the top the pack nearly lost trail again but not for long as we would ultimately trespass thru a small tunnel leading to a parking lot of what looked like a monastery. Down around the bend is where Psychodrunk would be snared by Sushi Cow Girl and Manko……Polo. After 10 minutes, it was hounds away again. Upon resuming the pursuit, The pack found the beer stop. This is the point where Sushi and Manko would take over for an injured Psychodrunk to lead us back to Nimitz Park for the down-down, but not before giving us the slip a few times. Many items were discussed during the down-downs to include Twat Waffles anal-versary and NFN Dave’s abbreviated naming. Questions were asked and NFN Dave who was given a proper name, blessed, and now and forever more shall be known as Yano Mas. At which point all hash business had been concluded, to be followed by swing low. “May the Hash go in peace,” “May the hash get a piece.” On On Chainsaw Assacre